i just had to post this: the video was aomthing that i have never seen that was sooo amazing, a Kate Bush song called "Cloudbusting" which was remarkable not for the song, but that the video stars Donald Sutherland (my favorite actor) and hes a scientist whos made a rainmaker machine and he gets arrested and kate goes to the top of the mountain and pulls the levers so the rain falls and the last few shots alternate between her at the machine and donald in the police car, realizeing its raining, having a moment thats so exciting that he cant contain himself so hes like secretly punching the air, looke out the back window and kisses his fist. wow.

Ok, so back in the saddle again! I am typing with a wad of cotton strapped to the top of my hands and another one on the inside of my arm. We just came back from my first chemo treatment and it was a breeze really. Watched some powerpuff girls (or is it powder puff i ask of Tracy?) and right now i feel sooo good.

The last week *mentally* really sucked, i really hate these in between waiting periods where its like i was scared of chemo and oh whats going to happen and then that one fear lets all of the other fears in the door, hello-fear-of-cancer somewhere else hello fear-of-needle etc etc. The last week was really awesome in other respects though because we employed distractive measures and took amtrack up to the bay area and went to Tracy's graduation and hung out in benicia and also went to Baja mexico for a quick jaunt and saw dolphins jumping in the surf and ate tons of lobster at Puerto Nuevo (which i highly highly recommend i wish i could eat lobster every night!) Went to the most lovely lovely lovely wedding de Allison and Andrew DALTON (tee hee!)at union station here in LA: it was so beautiful and elegent and there were alot of people there form the days back in santa cruz, i got to catch up with some good old friends. We changed the cable channels on the tv to get rid of hbo and now have a million discovery channels history channels and vh1 classics all good distractive enjoyable television fun. And weve been cat sitting Fern, the Dalton's (tee hee its giggly thrilling to now see allison as a dalton now!) cat, who is like the coolest person i have ever met. Shes totally funnny and sweet and really super smart, obsessed with the dvd player, where does that cd go? Shes figured out that the thing ins plugged into the wall, but its still puzzling her. I could go on about Fern, ill stop now. :)

So round one of chemo is over!! As Aaron said, "now we can count the treatments on one hand!" I am doing the CAF regimen, its a middle ground between the herceptin trial and another chemo called AC: its a little more chemistry but over a longer period of time at lower doses, and adds an additional drug (the F) to target the cells. The pharmicist came in to talk to us and he said that after the fourth treatment they believe that all of the bad cancer cells are destroyed. So that is a good point to look towards. I guess usually they like to give chemo in the morning so I surprised them a little with my 2:30 pm arrival. But its was really nothing at the hospital, i just got my blood pressure taken and weighed and then went into a room with a laz e boy chair and tv. They inserted and IV which is my least favorite thing i think and then after a little bit Connie (my nurse for half of it) started the F push fed into the iv, then the Adrimycin, then the Cytoxan. I didnt feel anything through this process. THen a long IV drip afterwards. And power puff girls. and then pokemon. (on the tv). That was it!

I have to do bloodwork everyweek to check my white blood cell counts, and thats about it. Perhaps i will feel nauseuos later, im hoping not so badly. It would be nice for this to be a piece of cake! Or at least a piece of bread with butter. I got a real crazy wig, its kinda like my hair before but all razor cut and crazy in the back. Im going to make a turban or two.

ok, vh1 classics is calling. what video will they play next? could it be duran duran "new moon on monday?" or will it be another deep purple video (boo hoo). Yes, i am addicted. :)